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1Getting Acquainted (Voyage) Empty Getting Acquainted (Voyage) Wed Aug 08, 2018 12:33 am

GORILLA JOE

Marine
Marine

GORILLA JOE
Harmabe rolled over in his bed, tossing and turning. He had spent the last night in and out of consciousness. Ever since he had joined the marines, he had found it much more difficult to get a full night of restful sleep. The humongous gorilla wasn't entirely sure why this was occurring, but it definitely was a massive inconvenience to him. After a few more minutes of trying to find a comfortable position to lie in, Harambe gave up. It was obvious that his body was telling him to get out of bed. Exasperated, he threw the sheets off of him, across to the other end of the room, and rolled out of his bed, hitting the ground with an almighty thump.

The Killa Gorilla plodded clumsily from his bedroom into the kitchen of his apartment; which may seem extremely spacious to the average human, but for an oversized simian like himself, there was not nearly enough square footage. Scratching his back, Harambe rifled through his refrigerator, looking for something to eat. The gorilla rubbed his forehead in frustration. Eggs again...For the sixth time this week. He grabbed a couple dozen out of the fridge and haphazardly cracked them into a frying pan, cooking himself up a tasty ape omelette.

After finishing his breakfast, Harambe bumbled back into his bedroom. There was a persistent feeling in the back of his head that he was forgetting something. He just couldnt quite put his finger on it. After aimlessly gazing around his room for a few minutes, the ape's eyes met his calendar. ITS TODAY!? A large red X marked today's date, with bold, underlined lettering: "TRAINING EXERCISE TODAY". Harambe frantically rushed around his room, pulling on his trademark grey sweatpants and hoodie. He made sure to grab the gargantuan banana which he called his weapon before flying out of the door and almost galloped towards the designated training area.

The situation was not a preferable one for Harambe. As the training area crept into his view, he could see his fellow ensigns already stood in a line, having orders barked at them by the officer in charge. I'm late... For a brief second, he flirted with the idea of trying to sneak his way into the line and pretend like he had got to the exercise on time. Of course, then the fact that he was a 20 foot tall gorilla slapped Harambe in his face. He was going to have to man up and take the chewing out which he knew would be coming his way. He slowed down his pace to a jog before making his way inside the training area, taking his place at the end of the already formed line of ensigns. He made sure to stand completely upright, and not to make any eye contact with the officer in charge.

"HOW NICE OF YOU TO SHOW YOUR FACE TODAY HARAMBE. WHAT WAS IT THAT MADE YOU DECIDE TO GRACE US WITH YOUR BEAUTIFUL PRESENCE"

Harambe knew that there was no correct answer to this question. There was no combination of words in the human language that he could piece together that would lead to him getting off scot-free. Not answering at all would be even worse. He did the best to mentally prepare himself for the berating which awaited him, before opening his mouth.

"Me sorry me late Mr...me mean sir. Me forget that today is train day. Me come fast as me can."

Painfully aware of the fact that he was slower mentally than everyone else, Harambe lowered his eyes as the rest of the ensigns sniggered at his speech patterns.

"BOY, EXPLAIN TO ME HOW A MAN WITH A HEAD AS LARGE AS YOURSELF, HAS SUCH A SMALL BRAIN CAPACITY?"

Again, the jest cut Harambe deep. He knew that he wasn't as smart as most other people, but he was trying his best.

"Me no no sir, me is sorry. Me come early next time me promise. This never make happen again, me never late no more."

The commanding officer was a man short of stature, even compared to his fellow humans. He couldnt have been taller than five feet and six inches. His head was buzzed, and cleanly shaven, and he had a face like he had just sucked all of the lemons on Water 7. Harambe pondered if the officer was such a jerk because he was insecure about his height.

"YOU BETTER NOT BE, BECAUSE NEXT TIME I'M FEEDING YOUR DISPROPORTIONATE BALLS TO MY DOGS! FALL IN LINE ENSIGN AND WAIT FOR FURTHER ORDERS, IM TIRED OF LOOKING AT THAT UGLY MUG OF YOURS."

Harambe did as he was told, not without cursing the officer in his head with every rude word he knew. He paid full attention to the instructions given to the group of new recruits. He wanted to impress in this training exercise, both to make up for his poor time management, and to get back at the napoleon complex-having officer.

"To start off, we are going to attempt to gauge the combat skills of you filthy maggots. Needless to say, we're not expecting anything out of you worthless sacks of vermin. Each of you will have a partner selected and you will spar in front of the entire group. I've been looking forward to this. Seeing you buffoons plod around like morons is going to make my week!"

The small man gave Harambe a look that he could only compare to the one a small toddler would give to his parents before committing some obscure act of mischief. The little man smirked before opening his mouth with a satisfied smirk.

"How about you grace us by going first. God knows if you fight like you talk we're in for a hell of a treat. You, over there! Fight the halfwit!"

Harambe walked slowly into the makeshift arena, as the crowd of ensigns and officers surrounded it, awaiting the show. He managed to keep his composure, somehow not losing his temper at the verbal battering that had been thrown his way. He felt bad for the man which had been chosen to face him. Harambe planned on beating him extremely convincingly in order to make a point to the officer.

The man which had been chosen to fight Harambe was the second tallest ensign on water 7. Of course, this was no close second. Not even remotely. Harambe's opponent stood at about six feet and eight inches tall. Compared to his fellow humans, he was practically a giant. Of course, compared to Harambe he was practically a midget. The killa gorilla made sure not to underestimate this man, however. They were all ensigns, this meant that they were all at somewhat of an equal power level. Harambe would prove that he was a step above all the rest.

The two ensigns stood about fifty feet apart from one another. Surrounding them was a thin crowd of marines, mostly ensigns with a few officers mixed in there. Harambe grasped his eighteen foot banana in his right hand, holding it firmly by the stalk. He looked at his opponent from across the arena. His face showed no signs of fear at the prospect of facing someone more than twice his size. The opponent held a (hopefully) blunted sword in his right hand, and was laser focused on Harambe.

The human made the first move, charging towards the Killa gorilla's position. Harambe knew that his advantage was his size, and the considerable reach which comes with that size. With his arms being around 11 feet long each, paired with the eighteen foot length of his weapon, Harambe had an effective reach of about twenty nine feet.

The second his opponent stepped within Harambe's effective range, the gorilla swung his banana from left to right, aiming to sweep the legs of his fellow ensign. Of course he didnt expect to make any contact, this was simply him feeling out his opponent, trying to get a feel for his movements. The human deftly jumped over the banana, from right to left, clearing the swing and continuing his dash to get within effective striking range of Harambe.

This time, the Gorilla swung his giant banana hammer from right to left, however at the last second adjusting the arc, bringing the banana upwards. As the human tried to jump over again, his legs were taken from beneath him, and he hit the ground with a painful-sounding thud. The second the human hit the ground Harambe brought his banana back around, slamming it into the the marines stomach as he lay on the ground. The gorilla watched with sympathy and the human keeled over, winded from the heavy impact. Harambe, beginning to get carried away, once again brought up his banana hammer, aiming to bring it down, not with malicious intent, but with just enough force to knock the human unconscious. Before it could make impact, one of the commanding officers, aside from small man, had intervened. Harambe didnt even have time to register what had happened. In an instant he had been disarmed, and an officer stood between him and his opponent.

"This one is over. Congrats to the winner."

Harambe looked over in the direction of the short officer, he was stood off to the side with his arms crossed. The smug look of mischief had been wiped off of his face, and was replaced with a mix of shock and blinding fury.

The short officer walked over to Harambe, standing as close to him as he could whilst still being able to look up at his face.

"Since youre so eager to prove yourself as a tough guy, i have a little job for you recruit."

The evil grin had made its home on the short man's face in an almost impossibly short amount of time.

"Me do what me told sir"

The small man's evil face twitched with every word which Harambe spoke.

"Go down to the cafe and fetch me my lunch. Its a massively important task that I can only trust you with, seeing as youre by far the strongest recruit."

The sarcasm was almost palpable.

Harambe knew that the short officer was doing this to demean him, but he wouldn't let it get to him. He was a marine, it was his job, at the core, to do what his superiors told him to. If that meant fetching the lunch of an officer who wanted to belittle him, he would do it with a smile on his face.

"yes sir. me get your lunch with much fastness sir"

Before even waiting for a response, Harambe turned around and was on his way. He jogged at a relatively fast pace towards the cafe. For a brief moment he contemplated spitting in the officers food when he picked it up, but dismissed the idea almost immediately. It wouldn't do to bring himself down to that level. He wouldn't have to take orders from the napoleon complex man forever. It was a simple inconvenience which he was more than capable of putting up with for the time being.

The smell of freshly cooked food filled Harambe's nostrils as he entered the small cafe. An unpleasant reminder that he had been living on a diet of pretty much only eggs for almost a month now. He approached the counter and gave the person manning it a warm smile.

"Officer from marines send i make me come pick up he lunch. He kind of short man, he want me be fast for pick up he food!"

The person behind the counter returned the smile, before grabbing a wrapped plate of food and placing it in Harambes large hand.

"So you're the unlucky one this year huh? He does this to one guy out of every fresh group of ensigns. Don't worry about it too much, he'll get bored of tormenting you soon buddy. It might seem like he's being an asshole, but its a tactic that most of the officers use. They try to weed out the mentally weak. That won't work on you though will it?"

Harambe shook his head before giving the attendant a cheesy grin.

"Nope! Me strong!"

Without waiting for a response, he turned around and darted out of the door. Heading straight back to the training area. He had already been late once today, he didn't plan on being late again.

As Harambe got back to the training area, it seemed that the last of the sparring sessions were wrapping up, and most of the ensigns were heading home. The small man was nowhere in sight. Harambe wandered over to another officer and saluted.

"Excuse sir! where small officer sir! me have for his lunch sir!"

The officer sighed, before meeting Harambe with sympathetic eyes.

"He's in his office over that way, ensign. I figured he was done with this nonsense. God speed, recruit."

Harambe was struggling to understand what the attendant at the cafe, and now this officer were talking about. There was nothing particularly challenging about picking up lunch for an officer. The verbal barrage he had received earlier had been far worse. He shrugged, before moving over to the small officer's office and knocking firmly.

"Get your ass in here, Ensign!"

Harambe entered the office, to see the small man leaning extremely far back in his chair behind his desk.

"Bring it over, unwrap it and put it down on my desk thanks."

Harambe did as he was instructed. The look of smug anticipation on the officer's face was beginning to worry him.

"Now"

The officer shot Harambe one of the dirtiest looks he had ever received.

"Feed me ensign. Get that spoon, and feed me"

So this is what they had meant. This was degradation. However demeaning it was, Harambe didn't care. Orders were orders, and the job of an ensign was to follow the orders which were given to him. He spooned the food into the officers mouth, as he chewed loudly with his mouth open, never breaking eye contact with Harambe. The look in the officer's eyes was one of superiority. However short he was, he was looking down on Harambe. The gorilla did not care. In his mind he was just following orders, and that made everything ok. After feeding the officer, he stood at attention, waiting to be dismissed.

"You follow orders well, Ensign. Perhaps your pea-brained ass with earn a promotion faster than any of these other maggots. Dismissed."

As Harambe left the office, he looked behind him, and saw the small man's whole demeanor had changed. For the first time he was looking at Harambe with a colleague. There was no warmth in his expression, but definitely a tinge of acknowledgment that he had put him through some bullshit, and Harambe had passed the shit test. As the gorilla left, he felt proud of himself. Sometimes his simple-mindedness came in handy. The training exercise today reinforced in his head that all he needed to do was follow orders and he would get stronger in the marines. He definitely needed to work on his lateness though.

Harambe got home and lay down in his bed, and for the first time since he had joined the marines, he slept like a baby

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